Why are you laughing?
When I woke up yesterday morning I had really good intentions as far as meals were concerned. Honestly. But Tater Tot is going through a phase, as they say, where he’s not always hungry when he wakes up. Some days he can’t get to the table fast enough and I’m convinced he’s going to eat his placemat before I can get the cereal or oatmeal or eggs to him. And then there are days when he might eat a piece of cheese and drink some milk and he’s happy until it’s time for lunch. Today was one of those days, minus the cheese.
He’s also in this other phase. It’s called being TWO-AND-A-HALF. You may have heard of it. Some people call it the “Drive-your-mother-to-the-brink-of-insanity” phase. Of course, that could just be my term for it, but from what I hear, it’s going to last until he turns four.
Our toddler is determined to show us just what a strong will he has about 893 times a day, and some of his favorite phrases include:
- No, I can’t!
- No, you can’t!
- No, I won’t!
- No, you won’t!
These are often accompanied by stomping, pouting, yelling, and all sorts of looks that are meant to show me just how mad and serious he is when, in fact, they are downright hysterical and it takes everything I have not to laugh.
If you’ve experienced the above, you know that the Time-Out chair is getting a lot of use around here. By about 11:00 yesterday morning, Tater Tot had made its acquaintance for refusing to take off his pajamas, throwing a fit over brushing his teeth, and cleaning up a mess he made. Also, by 11:00 the bottle of Aleve and I had made our daily acquaintance.
A little while later, Tater Tot wandered out onto the deck in his sock-feet, which is a NO-NO. Knowing that telling him to come in and/or going out to pick him up and bring him back in would result in another trip to time out, I made a decision based on the fact that the Aleve hadn’t kicked in yet.
I bribed him with M&Ms from the Easter basket. Thank goodness I hadn’t eaten those yet.
He was inside so fast that he nearly broke a sweat. He settled into a chair with a little cup of chocolate candies and some milk and I poured the biggest diet coke in history. I may as well have been drinking it from the 2-liter bottle, which you and I both know is what was going on.
As it so happened, yesterday was “Daddy Hot Dog Day” at Tater Tot’s Parent’s Day Out program. The plan was for us to meet his daddy at the church and then they’d go in and have their lunch date while I ran a couple of errands. That’s just what we did as the little man finished his cup of M&Ms. He and Tater Daddy had a fine time at lunch, and I spent a glorious 45 minutes picking up dog food and Huggies Pull-Ups. (Is it sad that I just described that as “glorious?”)
When I returned to pick up Tater Tot, his Daddy told me how good he’d been and what good manners he’d used and how proud he was of him. What mama doesn’t want to hear those things? Then he told me what every mama doesn’t want to hear.
“By the way, he only ate the chips and cake. Mostly cake. Okay, I’ll see y’all when I get home from work!” And just like that, he was gone with the wind.
Let’s recap, shall we? So far, the boy has had milk, M&Ms, cake, chips, and lemonade. I figured I had about 8 minutes before the “crash,” so I hightailed it home just in time for him to take a nice long nap.
When he woke up, he was in such a jolly mood that I decided it was the perfect opportunity to go shoe shopping. His feet have grown and he needs new tennis shoes, and I just knew one of the stores in the mall close to us would have the shoes I was looking for. I was WRONG. We did not come home with new shoes.
However, one of the stores did have these. I have no idea what they have to do with shoes, but there they were, right next to the register.
Now, believe it or not, we were actually going to stop and get some of these, or something like them, because we’re trying to get Tater Tot a little more motivated when it comes to using the potty. He knows how; he’s just not that interested, except at PDO where his teacher gives them these little treats. She says they work like a charm. I have no idea if they work like a charm or not. But I’m willing to try anything at this point, and bribery worked pretty well earlier in the day. Why not give it a shot?
Tater Tot had been so good at both shoe stores that I let him have a couple of the Scooby Doo snacks when we got to the car. Then I got distracted because we were in heavy traffic, and by the time I cut through to a quieter street, the package of snacks was nearly empty. Gone! His little jaws must have been in turbo chewing mode.
At that point I just decided to call it a day and go home. I wanted to be there when the call came telling me I’d been selected as Mother of the Year by Eating Well Magazine or something like that.
I’m happy to report that Tater Tot ate several bites of chicken along with more potatoes than I thought humanly possible at supper. Of course, we all know that those carbs turn straight to sugar, so I’m not really fooling anyone. That boy was a walking lump of SHUGAH all day long.
Yesterday was pretty much a bust in the healthy eating category, even though the Scooby Doo fruit snacks claim to be high in vitamin C. For some reason that doesn’t make me feel any better.
I’m hopeful that today will be better. I’ll tell you this much for sure. We don’t have to worry about Tater Tot eating too many M&Ms for a while. As soon as he went to bed last night, I ate every single one. It was a sacrifice I felt I had to make.