It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

So, it’s somewhere around 3 a.m. and here I sit.  No, actually, here I cough is more like it.  I haven’t been to bed yet because of the cough, and about an hour ago I had a brilliant idea.  The idea turned into a plan, and now I wish I’d never wasted my time being brilliant in the first place.

Do y’all have McAlister’s Delis in your neck of the woods?  If the answer is no, well, I am so sorry.  Because y’all are missing out on some really good sweet tea.  Not to mention the chicken tortilla soup.  

Almost any time that this dreaded sinus attack occurs, the food that sounds most appealing to me is the aforementioned soup.  It’s just spicy enough to soothe an irritated throat, and mine is most irritated after a week of coughing and carrying on.

Sadly, McAlister’s doesn’t operate like Walgreens, and I haven’t found one that stays open 24 hours for emergencies just like this one.

What’s a coughing, miserable, and slightly put-out girl to do?

Well this girl hauled it into the kitchen and did the only thing I could think of.

I made Ro-Tel.  Because it’s really the same as chicken tortilla soup, right?  Just without the chicken.  And all of the other stuff that’s in the soup.  But what I was going for was the spiciness (is that a word?), and at 2 a.m. you really can’t be that picky.

We had a few Frito’s Scoops, so I polished those off and then I had to open a bag of On the Border chips.  I have to say that the chips are much better with salsa, and — in my humble opinion — Frito’s Scoops are the only way to eat Ro-Tel.  Tostito’s Scoops will do in a pinch, but Frito’s are really the way to go.

OH MY WORD, WOMAN!  PLEASE STOP THE THESIS ON “HOW BEST TO EAT RO-TEL” AND GET ON WITH IT!

Duke and I sat on the couch while I stuffed myself with Ro-Tel and diet Coke like I was at an sixth-grade slumber party.

Then, when I was pretty darn sure that my mouth and all of my taste buds were numb, I decided that this was the perfect time to take some cough medicine.  Surely I wouldn’t be able to taste anything after what I’d just eaten.  I almost did a happy dance right there in the kitchen to celebrate my smarty-pantsness.  (It’s funny how easy it is to create new words in the wee hours of the morning.)

Fearlessly, I took a big spoon from the drawer and poured a heaping dose of Robitussin.  Even though I could smell its nasty aroma, I put the spoon in my mouth and started to swallow it.

‘Kay.  Here’s the thing.  Ro-Tel does not, in fact, numb the taste buds.  And it is highly probable that chasing Ro-Tel with Robitussin will cause untold amounts of discomfort, not to mention all kinds of gagging and flailing about the kitchen.

Once I recovered and kicked myself about seven times for being so brilliant, I went back to bed for a grand total of 43 seconds.  Because guess what?

Unlike sixth-graders, who have iron stomachs, those of us in our late thirties (ahem, oh, that one’s a hard one to write) must watch not only WHAT we eat but WHEN WE EAT IT.  Or else we might just find ourselves with an annoying case of heartburn that intensifies when in the lying-down position.

Now that I’ve had some time to reflect on my original idea, I’m thinking that being brilliant isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.  

(Of course, I wouldn’t really know, would I?)

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. JLI
    Dec 17, 2008 @ 09:24:30

    We have McAlister’s here but I’ve never tried the soup. Shouldn’t be long before I do though! Sounds yummy! Funny timing…I bought Ro-Tel and Velveeta for a quick snack/dinner for this week since we leave day after tomorrow. And a word about Tostitos? They now have Tostitos Scoops with a Hint of Jalapeno! Mmm, yummy! T has sworn he’ll fart me right out of my seat on the plane for bringing home such a concoction after us stuffing ourselves with chili for 3 days in a row! Are you feeling better?

    ********************************
    Sounds like a FUN plane ride!! 🙂

    I’m feeling better, thank you. Coughs are just so annoying!

    I know you’re excited about your travels!!

    Reply

  2. Heather
    Dec 17, 2008 @ 09:58:12

    Sadly there are no McAlister’s Delis in Northern Virginia. It amazing to me with all the different places there are to eat around here that esatblishments like McAlister’s and Schlotzsky’s have yet to arrive in our area. Oh well I can always hope :)!

    FYI If you take around a tablespoon of honey and a wee bit of lemon juice and mix it together and then nuke it for a few seconds in the microwave and then down that sucker your throat will thank you for it – trust me. The honey coats your throat and helps to fend off that itch that makes you have to cough all the time.

    The lady at CVS yesterday told me that she read an article where they said if you put Vick’s VapoRub on the bottom of your feet and then put socks on over your now gooey feet it helps prevent coughing. I would like to hear the story of how that one was discovered… you know what they say about necessity being the mother of invention ;).

    Reply

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