In Which I Ate a Pound of Bacon and Then Drank Some Gravy…

Lo, the sins I have committed against my arteries in the last eight hours would make a cardiologist declare me a hair shy of becoming a solid.

My husband does not like roast beef.  It’s a dirty little family secret, but he won’t come near it.  I have no idea why and he can’t really explain it, but if I cook a roast he doesn’t eat it.  I don’t cook them often, but sister-girl needs a good roast every now and then.  On the occasions when I do give in to my love of all things roast-related, I throw some chicken in the oven for Tater Daddy so he doesn’t waste away or anything absurd like that.

Yesterday was one such occasion.  I threw a big ol’ roast into the crock pot with some Lipton Onion Soup mix, a good bit of water, some Worcestershire and pepper.  About an hour later the house smelled sooooo wonderful that I was just giddy.

Then I found a recipe for a green bean casserole, only this one had the word BACON in the title.  Could the day get any better?  (It actually called for bacon bits.  Right.  Like I’m going to use those when I have a package of the real stuff in the fridge.)  I commenced a-fryin’ and did a little “Who cares if the house and my hair (holla, Boo Mama!) smell like bacon for three days” dance right there in the kitchen.  Since the casserole only needs a few ounces of bacon — and I hate to put unfried bacon back in the refrigerator — I did the only thing I could do, which was to fry the whole 16 ounces.

And let me tell you, honey, that bacon sandwich with a side of bacon I had was to die for!  Of course, considering what I ate yesterday, the odds of that happening increased significantly.

Around 4:30 the house smelled so incredibly scrumptious that I had to check on the roast.  Translation:  I wanted to see if it was ready to sample.  Translation:  I love the juice and wanted to funnel taste it.  Forget about putting it in the skillet, adding flour and making thick gravy.  This is one girl who likes her gravy straight.  I believe some people might call it au jus.  I call it OH! JUICE!  After about three or twenty-seven samples, I decided to leave some for….

The mashed potatoes!  Real ones.  With real Land-O-Lakes butter.  (As if there’s any other kind.)  

And to drink?

Diet coke.  

Because you know me.   I’m  health-conscious and don’t believe in adding unnecessary calories.

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14 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Tatersmama
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 03:02:19

    Hey, did you even think of ME while you were downing that “almost a pound” of bacon?
    *drools*

    Reply

  2. Lindsey Langhans
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 09:51:06

    Oh my gosh…I am on a serious diet and your tales of deliciousness…totally have me drooling! I love a good roast…but what southern girl doesn’t? Oh and green bean casserole with bacon…shut up! that sounds like a pure sin!!! I am vicariously living through you and your good meals while I diet! 🙂

    Reply

  3. Kim H.
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 09:51:24

    I’m cracking up over the diet coke… that is soooo something I would do. Go get some chicken fried steak or something and then make sure to have diet coke! HA!

    Reply

  4. JLI
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 09:58:02

    Yeah, okay…I’d like to know what planet I’ve been livin’ on that I didn’t know Worcestershire sauce was a necessary ingredient? My husband does that and, and, AND A-1 sauce! I mean H-E-L-L-O!

    Reply

  5. Lora Lynn
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 10:10:04

    au jus = Oh! Juice!

    Nice. Very nice.

    Reply

  6. Meg @ Spicy Magnolia
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 10:14:07

    You are too funny! Wish I could have partaken in all that yumminess…it mighta just kicked Polka outta here! 🙂

    Reply

  7. Heather
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 11:18:24

    You crack me up girl! My husband is the exact same way about roasts – what’s up with that? Now I can overlook the fact that he doesn’t like sour cream, mayo, pickles or olives. I can even forgive him for not liking guacamole since that leaves more for me to eat, but pot roast …well that’s pushing it even for me! Good thing he’s so stinkin’ sweet, handsome and funny or we’d have issues ;).

    Reply

  8. Melanie
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 13:21:32

    Oh, well, now you’re talking my language! Bloggie friend of mine, that is by far my fav-or-ite meal on earth. The injustice of my life is that as I’ve gotten older, my body doesn’t tolerate this most scrumptious and beloved comfort meal as it used to and I pay dearly whenever I have it. Doesn’t stop me from having it, mind you, I just kind of go into it knowing what’s going to happen and make sure my pills are close by.

    Mmmm, when’s dinner?

    Reply

  9. Melanie
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 13:22:56

    Oh and just a little side note – for some reason whenever I have roast beef, I really crave milk. Weird.

    Reply

  10. thefarmerfiles
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 14:52:26

    LOL…am the same way about the Diet Coke….but laughed over the lb. of bacon. I do the same!

    Reply

  11. pcb
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 18:45:50

    OH, MY! YUM!

    Reply

  12. Kerstin
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 19:51:54

    Oh my word- I am sitting here at my computer drooling!! That sounded soooo good!!!

    Reply

  13. Jamie
    Jan 14, 2009 @ 23:55:44

    Yep, throw in a Diet Coke and call it even. Another little-known food fact: cookies eaten in small chunks don’t count. Great way to keep from taking in more calories than you should.

    Reply

  14. Trackback: Eating Crow Isn’t So Bad « Tater Tales

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